wasn’t very lively all day even talked about going to bed right away a little work, a little thinking tried to make someones day a little brighter they didn’t want to hear it wanted to be doing something else wanted someone to listen wanted someone to tell me their problems just for a little while just for a moment wanted to open up with out fear fear is constantly chasing these days of late not fear of judgement fear of failure fear of not being good enough the fear must be rather weak for sitting happens and not much else, all the time thoughts come and go but no sign of life is found if the consequences are not feared fear is relatively insignificant no death nor pain will come no homelessness, no hunger life is far to easy here not needing or wanting leaves you free a bum in his own house driving his own car what does he want??? he only asks for ‘just enough’ just enough, nothing more it’s not the way to riches it’s not the way to fame it might just be the way trying to keep the chin up each and every day trying to do a little good now and then but each day there are questions how come the future isn’t brighter? isn’t it really caused by greed isn’t it my duty to see what’s really going on and say something maybe say something instead of buying something why preach if you yourself are unsure no one preached to you… it just happened putting the question out there should sufice for now you’ve always heard ‘there are no dumb questions’ this country is rotten to the cor and still all the attention is paid to the bruise on the surface the people of this country are deaf, dumb and blind but it’s easier that way and yes, I am one of those people deaf, bum and blind I will always be noticing just a fraction of what surrounds me love and pain… hope and indifference I just hope something happens soon I want to be a part of a movement I do not want to be it’s leader but I will bring people to it hopefully, not too far off in the future our children or our grand children will see hope in the future again they will see wise intelligent people behind old eyes people who realised that they had to start taking some responsibility for what they have done for what their for fathers had done even if it’s too late lets at least go out with some dignity chins raised high with honor or maybe not… we are X some would call us the lazy generation given the fruit early we think typing on a key board or talking on the phone is hard labor we can’t even walk up the stairs because we’ve grown so lazy maybe we’ll realise that we don’t need to fight daddy’s war anymore maybe we’ll run our entire lives by remote control travel without going anywhere love someone without even meeting them check in on them constantly because the media says you need improvement X is not the beginning or the end I wish I could say we’re hiding buried treasure but I don’t know… maybe we are that’s much nicer than being insignificant that’s right go out and be some body and prove them all wrong prove that you don’t fit that stereo-type prove that you do have wits and that once in a while when your parents said something smart, you were listening even my parents said smart things once in a while I didn’t catch all of it but once it a while I heard things like “do what I say and not what I do” “life is like water, cup you hand and let it fill you instead of grabbing at” “be kind, even if it means you have to walk away” “stand up for the rights of everyone, one day you might need help sanding up for yours” “don’t do anything else in bed but sleep, train your mind and body to sleep in bed”<—- I think I messed that one up If I’m ever a parent I hope I say something smart once in a while I hope I tell my children that I love them enough so they don’t question it but not so much that it’s completely annoying I hope I can be open with them and not have it backfire too badly I hope I have kids that have a sense of humor about life I hope I have kids with someone cool Someone that is confident but not cocky has their shit together but doesn’t mind if I’m a bit crazy someone who can chop wood, hike an unmaintained trail and tries to kick my ass at everything someone surprising and who has no problem having a conversation with any type of animal who likes ancient history and legions, magic and dreams who has their own take on art someone who is accepting and forgiving someone who thinks people are good and hates no one someone who stays in touch with their old lovers because if they were good enough to love once, they are good enough to talk to later someone like me in some ways but different in more ways someone who can talk for hours about death and the religious and political forces behind life someone who doesn’t mind that I like Sex and the City (judgementals out there) some who has loved and lost and come out the other side still smiling and hopeful that their heart will open again one day one day one day that heart will open it will stop hiding behind lies one day that heart will be healthy and free… the end. time to go to work.. yee fucking ha!